Your Weekly Horoscope for September 15 to 21, 2024

If it feels like fate…it probably is.

I’m currently living my long-held dream of residing in the mountains while writing about sex full-time; basically, I’m like Carrie Bradshaw if she was queer dog parent who exclusively shops at REI. When I signed the lease on my 600-square-foot home, however, I must have momentarily forgotten that being a sex journalist means getting gifted sex toys up the wazoo by pleasure product companies hoping to score coverage. Don’t get me wrong—trying and reviewing pleasure products is certainly a perk of the job, but figuring out where to put all the free swag since relocating has been a problem. As a result of my new-found space considerations, I’ve recently come to appreciate versatile sex toys that double as functional objects (which, yes, do exist). Think: this cutesy, bird-shaped vibrator that moonlights as a lamp, and this chic bullet that can be worn as a necklace.

So when I heard about the SVAKOM Pulse Galaxie Air Pulsator With Star Projector ($109), which functions as a suction sex toy and mood-setting device, all in one, I was intrigued. This suck-y clitoral stimulator has a built-in mood-setting function that, when activated, transforms your bedroom into a star-watching sanctuary. Neat, right?

In typical sex writer fashion I couldn’t help but wonder if this feature was actually something to write home—er, on the internet—about, or nothing more than a kitschy extra. Ahead, my full SVAKOM Pulse Galaxie review that makes it clear it is definitely the former.

SVAKOM Pulse Galaxie Air Pulsator with Star Projector — $109.00

Suction modes: 5 | Speeds: 5 | Material: Body-safe silicone, ABS plastic

Pros:

Charging dock doubles as mood-setting star projector
Sizeable nozzle opening fits a wider variety of clitoral sizes
Nozzle made from flexible silicone that supports comfort
Compatible with the SVAKOM app for long-distance play
Discreet design and shape
Unique crescent shape is easy to hold
More affordable than other pulsation toys

Cons:

Only available in one color
A bit noisy when it comes into contact with your body
Not waterproof, only water-resistant

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My first impressions of the Pulse Galaxie

When I first removed the Pulse Galaxie from its packaging, I was struck by how different it looks from the other sex toys in my collection. It isn’t phallic like most dildos, it doesn’t have the lil’ ears like rabbit vibrators, and doesn’t look as, well, hungry as most other air-suction toys with their ravenous mouths. Instead, it looks like a perfume bottle—sleek, subtle, and decorative all at once.

The toy comes with a flat-based charging dock, which is the portion of the product that works overtime as a projector. The semi-spherical air pulsator slides into this port—the side that touches your body face-down for protection—when it is getting re-juiced, as well as for storage. Together, the two halves create a discrete orbicular design that obscures the sexual nature of the product.

While the exterior of the toy is made from a hard, ABS plastic, split the toy in half and inside you’ll see that the portion that goes around or on your genitals is made from a silky-soft silicone. (Yes, both of these materials are body safe). Running my eyes over the nozzle—that’s the portion of the toy that provides the actual stimulation—I was thrilled by how large it is.

To understand why I was excited by its size you need to understand how air suction toys work. “Air sucker toys create a vacuum over your clitoris,” explains AASECT-certified sex educator and love coach Suzannah Weiss, CES MA, and author of Subectified: Becoming a Sexual Subject. They have a mouth, also known as the head or the nozzle, that is designed to go directly over your glans clitoris, she explains. Once turned on, these toys use unique technology to pull, pulse, and push air against your external hotspot. “It essentially feels like a blow-job on a clitoris and is one of the most effective forms of clitoral stimulation, leading to orgasms within seconds for many,” she says.

Thing is, in order to adequately cover the clitoral glans with pleasure air, your clit has to fit inside the nozzle. Unfortunately, many of the popular air suction vibrators on the market have bite-sized openings that only work for those with genitals that are on the small side of the spectrum, even when engorged with want. With its nickel-sized nozzle, the Pulse Galaxie can accommodate most clitoral shapes and sizes—even those with bottom growth due to gender-affirming testosterone hormone therapy should be able to enjoy this toy.

Setting the scene

As a remote worker who writes about sex for a living and makes my bed work double as a desk, I’ve learned that setting the scene—by lighting candles, turning on R&B, and turning on DND—is an essential step in my solo play. Without it, my brain stays imprisoned in work mode and I’m not able to fully melt into the pleasure of the moment.

Even if you aren’t a sex journalist and have a strict No Working From Bed rule, however, “the act of setting up your space for sex, can give your brain the chance to queue your body in that pleasure is on the horizon,” according to sex educator Marla Renee Stewart, MA, expert with Lovers and co-author of The Ultimate Guide To Seduction and Foreplay. “It begins the sexual arousal process, helping you start to climb toward peak pleasure and orgasm even before you’ve touched yourself or turned on your sex toy,” she says.

Despite knowing this, I just wasn’t convinced that setting the scene with the star projector built into the Pulse Galaxie would be that much better than the light of a flickering candle. After all, a light is a light is a light, right? Wrong. Having used the projector many a time, I can promise that the constellations are way better to wank to than candles. As Stewart says, “Humans have always been fascinated and captivated by the night sky, so staring at the projected stars can evoke feelings of wonder and excitement” that a candle alone simply cannot.

My SVAKOM Pulse Galaxie review

The first time I got down with the Pulse Galaxie, I had to give my pre-masturbation ritual a makeover by, well, doing less. The manual informed me that the star projector worked best in pitch black. So my candle collection? Unlit. My twinkly lights? Unplugged. The only part of my solo-pleasure prep I did keep was making sure my lubricant was within reach and disabling alerts from my phone-cum-speaker.

Stripped and set, I removed the stimulator from its dock and then tapped the sparkle insignia on the dock to activate the stars. To the surprise of my inner skeptic, there was nothing kitschy nor dinky about this star projector. Instead, the project covered (covered!) the ceiling and surrounding walls of my sleep sanctuary with purple stars. I’m not a particularly witchy person, but there’s no better descriptor—the effect was magical.

The galactical scene was so entrancing that I kept my eyes open and slowly traced my body while looking at the stars, rather than closing my eyes and fantasizing as I usually do. Once I felt the familiar “ready” thrum between my legs, I lathered my body and the opening of the stimulator with water-based lubricant, turned the air pulsator on, and finally brought it between my legs.

Much like other air suction and air pulsation toys, the sensation felt akin to having a lover suckle my skittle like a sour candy. While most similar toys immediately sent me over the edge in 30 seconds or less, however, even the most intense of the Pulse Galaxies suction settings turned up the heat slowly, allowing me to bask in the sensation of a building orgasm.

When I did eventually come, the orgasm was as strong as the ones I’ve come to expect from similar toys. But the entire experience was actually more pleasurable because it didn’t hit me faster than I could say “Oh, starry night,” but rather came on gradually—giving me ample time to enjoy the vibey atmosphere as it did.

svakom pulse galaxie sky projections — *Photo: SVAKOM*

Final thoughts

These days, the SVAKOM Pulse Galaxie Air Pulsator With Star Projector remains in my bedside table, rather than getting relegated to my across-town storage unit with the less versatile toys in my collection. That’s because no matter how many times I’ve chosen to get off surrounded by its makeshift night sky, it simply doesn’t get old.

All in all, I’d readily recommend this air sucker to anyone who finds setting the scene to be as important a factor in their sex sessions as the sensations. I’d also recommend it to folks who are intrigued by air suction toys, but have been put off by the steep prices of competitor products. Ringing up at $109, the Pulse Galaxie is a more affordable alternative and has a mouth that can be enjoyed by a wide range of pleasure seekers—not just those with itty bitty clits.

The only pleasure-seekers I wouldn’t recommend this product for are those with roommates (and thin) walls; the toy makes a noticeable whirring sound when it touches your skin. Power-hunters who aren’t awed by the night sky may also be better suited to more powerful clit suction toys like the Womanizer Next ($219) or We-Vibe Melt ($159). But if you go that route, I suggest purchasing a standalone star projector so that you still get off to the galaxy.